Electronic Stretch Screamers

Greetings! It has been awhile since I wrote about a toy and since I'm in the mood, I feel that I'll talk about a toy that I had little time be with, but it left a big impact on me for all the wrong reasons. These are the Electronic Stretch Screamers. I could not find a picture of all four of the original together because blah. For those not in the know (don't blame you), these toys were foot long monster figures made of plastic, rubber and, well, electronics. The original forms were a Frankenstein monster, a ghoul with the screamer face, a werewolf and a mummy. When stretched or twisted in different ways, these toys would scream, threaten and wail in pain, because torturing things because they're different is fun :) Above: The target demographic for these toys.

Also noteably is the presence of plastic bubbles full of colorful swirly goo in their heads. When squeezed, they would come out of an some hole. For the ghoul, it came out of the mouth. For the Frankenstein monster, out the top of the head. For werewolf, the cheek and for the mummy, an empty eyesocket. So not only would you be contorting their bodies in inhumane ways, but you'd be squeezing their organs out. Now, my expirience with one. Naturally, I bought the ghoul because ghouls rock. My mom would tell me to turn off in public because the thing was noisy as hell. My expirience with the toy was less than 24 hours. Why? Well, someone should tell toymakers that boys toys need to be durable, 'cause we're all a bunch of morons who can't control outrselves. Plastic bubbles aren't durable.

So, one day, I stretched and stretched the bubble, tempting my fate with every cranial squeeze...

And then... Yes, the fucking thing exploded, covering me in red goo. After that, playing with the toy wasn't so amusing. Therefore, I spent about 20 dollars on a gooey explosion. Above: Another victim of the Electronic Stretch Screamers. He still remembers.

That's all! Remember, parents; don't let your child buy exploding toys.